Revamping

*This message is being posted in both This Is My Story and Thoughts of the Common Viewer*

Hello everyone,

For those who don't this, I have been trying to run two blogs for the last couple of years, being moderately successfully.

At one point Common Viewer was being updated daily, but honesty that became a hassle and took away from truly enjoying TV. So even though I was legitimately making real traction and people were reading my stuff, I took a break from the action.

Meanwhile I kinda stopped blogging in general. If you read my latest blog entry Catch Up FAQ, life is boring and not a whole lot really happens anymore, so those personal entries have been few and far between.

So where am I going with this history lesson?

During the last week I've been trying to combine my passions and truly give me a real outlet to get them out. Also I want to try to include social networking into my work so I could get my name out there, especially on Twitter. I think I figured it out.

Depending on which blog you are reading this in, if you look to the right you could some organization displaying my mini-blog series and special entries attached to it. I would include a breakdown here but I figured that would be a redundant.

Also from here on out, most Common Viewer entries will be Twitter exclusive. This will be done so it doesn't litter up my facebook timeline. Also most of the entries I post will be specific to a certain group of people and will be filled with hashtags.

Most blogs will be up on Thursdays, unless I find time otherwise which is rare.

That is about it from me.

Thank you for reading this and hope you enjoy my work for a long time to come.

---Blake

"Catch Up FAQ"

7/17/12

Recently I listened to the song Bruises by Train. If you haven't heard it, I suggest it.

Listening to that made me want to get in touch with some old friends but then I realized something. I had nothing to say. Maybe it's the social media world we live in where we know what's going on in each other's lives via facebook or twitter or maybe it's the fact that we are getting older and life really isn't that interseting, well at least not interseting enough to share with someone who isn't living with you.

This came to a head when I talked to one of my best female friends and asked why is it so difficult to simply say "I miss you & love you" without having an uncomfortable convo. She said something so simple yet true:

"Cause there's a usually a strange need to "catch up" ever on everyday boring stuff."

So that being said I'm going to write this to my friend as tomaybe make it easier to talk. I call it the "Catch Up FAQ!"

- Me & Mandy are alot better than we've ever been before. We've gotten through our rough patches and are now stronger than ever. It sounds like we fight alot but honestly 90% of that is just friendly bickering.

- CJ is doing great. Still can't believe he's four. He's starting to become too smart for his own good. In many ways he's your typical four year old, opinionated, test his boundaries, throws fits, loves to be outside, no fear at all and just a joy to be around 80% of the time. But with his autism, the bad times are multiplied to a different level. He gets overwhelmed and over stimulated very easily at times. If he has a hard time understanding something, or out of his routine, it's the end of world. In most occasions I hve to play bad cop but I'm okay with that. I don't need him to like me all the time. His hugs & kisses of love are good enough for me.

- Work is work. Honestly I am having my problems adjusting. I spent six plus years in a job where I was just about always doing something. Now I spend most of my day sitting at a security desk listening to podcasts and playing games. On a day like today, I'm exhausted so sitting is making me more tired. I am definately looking for other work still. I keep reminding myself tht I had to take this job to get out of the airport on my own terms.

- Yes I still like going out but my priorites have changed. Don't get insulted if I say no I don't feel like going out. The reason could be as simple as I'm a bit tired, I want to spend the night with after CJ goes to bed. Maybe I just don't feel like it. Honestly sometimes nights at home just watching TV with Mandy and CJ is more fun to me than going out and drinking without a real purpose. If you are throwing a party or going out for a reason, I'm in. But it's just because you want to get hammered or "live your life" those days are past me. I guess I've grown up and became a family man.

I think those are the major ones.

But people don't take this the wrong way. I still love talking to people, bullshitting with people, if something major, minor or funny happened, I still want to know. I'm just sick of the uncomfortable small talk about things all the time. Life might be boring if nothing changes but that just means when something does happen to change it'll mean more.

Before I forget one more thing I want to address and this will make alot of people happy. Now that I'm on Instagram, I will NOT be mass texting pictures anymore. The way my account works now, anyone who matters and wants to see what's going on can in now three places.

I think that's everything I have to say.
Thank you. =)

A Letter to Pat Monahan (A Retraction)

I'm a very emotional person so every so often I get out of hand and jump to conclusions I really shouldn't. In the pre-facebook and twitter days when I would rant in my livejournal, they were be very locally see. Did it piss off people? Yes but it wasn't on a grand national scale. It was minor and really didn't affect anything or anyone in the long run outside of my inner circle.

Well Sunday, I exploded and pressed send without thinking about it twice. After Mandy had a bit of a breakdown after Summerfest on Friday night, I did what any good husband would do, attacked the source of the pain. I then wrote what in wrestling would be known as a shoot. I attacked the band Train and mainly, and most importantly, Pat Monahan. I accused him of picking on Mandy because of her size and simply forgetting about her when he promised her a picture. In the moment it seemed like the right thing to do. I was angry and it was the only way I knew to take care of the problem.

Then two things happened. First I got a tweet from a fan:

Then me and Mandy found video of the Don't Stop Believin performance in question on YouTube last night:



Jump to 1:15. That's when Mandy gets on stage.

After watching, it wasn't nearly as bad as Mandy thought. The facts are that Pat treated her great, even gave her a hug. The experience was alot better than she remembered because of how the end of the night went.

So for the first time in all the years of blogging, I am retracting my blog. I also want to apologize to the band Train, Pat Monahan himself and all the fans of the band, so I'm sorry.

Also if this did indeed reach Pat, which I would assume it did, I'm sincerely sorry. My wife is an uber fan and has turned to your music for years through the good and bad times. This will not change.

Thank you.



Father's Day: The Work Edition

6/18/12

There aren't many moments in a calendar year that really stand out. Once in a while there's a moment that stands still and makes you super happy. That was Father's Day afternoon for me this year.

This was the first time since CJ was born that I had to work on Father's Day. I had Sundays off for so long that I am still having problems getting usd to getting up every week and going to work.

Mandy had an idea to actually come to work and have lunch with me The three of us. A little family time. Nothing crazy, just pizza on the dock. Well it poured on Saturday night sitting on the docks were not going to work as planned, so i set up a big exercise mat and a blanket I found in my trunk on the floor. Around 12:30, Mandy and CJ showed up.

I'll be honest it was pizza and crazy bread, but it wasn't about the food. It was the three of us on a mat spending time together. To me it was perfect. In a bizzare way it was the perfect family lunch and it made me so happy.

For the last week I've been going through alot mentally, questioning whether or not I am a good parent. Hey I'll admit I'm still learning. I know parenting isn't easy, I know he's never going to like me 100% of the time.I seem to fit well in the bad guy role with Mandy playing the good guy.

But through all the yelling and screaming, all the fighting and the brattiness of a soon to be four year old, espeecially with the added fun of autism (for the record, not s a crutch or excuse, but as a fact and reality), I know he loves me. My son does indeed love me.

This full realization came to me on a gym mat on the floor of a warehouse.

A rare perfect moment, in a no so perfect life.

Notes from a Night Out

5/28

 Finally able to put all the pieces together from the guys night out the other night. I was way too tired yesterday to write anything down. So before my short term memory starts messing me up, let me at write down a few notes.

Air Hockey: Reilly vs. Fellows...7-4, 3-7, 5-7

Karaoke performances:

All Star
How Do You Like Me Now
Life is A Highway
Voices

If I Had A Million Dollars
Men in Black
It's All Been Done

Bohemian Rhapsody

The Playoff Hangover

5/22

Boy these playoffs are starting to kick my ass!

I figured when I got a job that started later in the morning and I could get a little more sleep, I would get rid of this tired feeling.

I'm convinced I'm starting to have playoff game hangovers.

Games start at 7ish my time and usually, by the time I get through post game it's after 10. This doesn't seem so bad to the average person, and back in the old days it didn't seem that bad, especially in Eastern time.

But that was nine years ago. It was a completely different time. I was younger. Now 16 games into their run I'm realizing, as a fan I'm exhausted.

As most people who know me know (and if you don't have you been living under a rock?) I get very emotional invested in my teams. I know SHOCKER! It comes with being a sports fan. But what fans around here don't get, it's easiest to survive a championship in football than any other sport. I mean let's be honest, the Packers & Giants runs were both impressive but both teams played four games to win their respective Super Bowls, lasted a month and there was plenty of time to breather in between. Baseball fans (for the Mets, Brewers and Cubs fans, not Yanks and White Sox) don't even know what a real championship run is like. As for basketball, I'm convinced that it is the only sport of the big four that people are more mega fans of the players than the teams themselves. Just my view from the outside, as I am not a basketball fan. But the way the NHL formats the playoffs, it's very non stop. The longest break between games is two days.

Back when the Devils were red between between 94 and 03, it was a wild ride. Games would go late, some nights very little sleep was had. I mean if anyone remembers Game 5 & 6 of the 2000 Finals alone, it was insane. In those days I was emotional invested, but at the time, other than the 2000 Finals that ended up during finals week, it didn't really affect much. At the time sleep was overrated. I mean there times during a couple of those runs I would actually go out AFTER games.

Now jump nine years later. It's the middle of my third Devs/Rangers playoff series. Life has caught up to me. Every game night consits of making sure stuff is ready for work the next day, family dinners and CJ's bedtime. By the time eveything is done, CJ is in bed and even Mandy is asleep, it's the third period and I'm exhausted. The game ends and I head upstairs to watch post game, tweet a bit and update facebook. By the time it's all over, I hit the sack and honestly even if it's not THAT late, mentaly it is. Then I get up and I'm still exhausted and now here I sit at work looking like I haven't slept, trying to be professional. That my friends is the playoff hangover.

When you find yourself saying to yourself, I think bedtime is going to be between 9 & 9:30 because it's a non game night. When a series gets you so emotionally invested that you're just not mentally there the next morning.

This has been me in this series.

Questions from My Mind

5/21

Have you ever seen the "Civil War" episode of Boy Meets World season seven?

For those who haven't, I suggest it. It's a big two part episode at the end of the series.

It brought alot of things to mind. How close are we all to getting to the point of no return?

How many times can someone treat you like shit before you finally move on?

How many times can you forgive and forget?

How many times can someone hurt you before you've had enough?

How long before you finally snap?

How long can you handle an one sided friendship or relationship?

How many times can you hear the phrase "I've changed" or "I've missed you so much"?

Before I continue, I'm not perfect. I've never claimed to be. I've done alot of things and said alot of things that even I'm shocked certain people have stayed in my life.

There have been many in my past that have walked away, an in about 95% of cases I look back and don't blame em.

But for me personally I've had a long line. This may come from having a different mentality about friendships and even relationship in general.

I've always believed that no matter how bad things get, how ugly a situation, how much you've hurt each other in the past, if you work hard enough you can repair any relationships, and in some cases, my marriage included, make it stronger.

Maybe it's naive, or maybe it comes from a time period in my life when I thought I had nothing but some fare-weather friends and a bunch of people who love to get drunk. If there is something I did take out of that time period was the meaning of a true friendship.

For me I look at a true friend as not only are there for the good or bad times but for those times in between. You know those days when you need to vent, days you just want to go out for a drink, walk through the mall or even answer message they are extremely busy/stressed themselves, just so you get off the ledge.

That being said, back to my point, my time is line is long when putting up with being ignored, cancelled on ore even just feeling like it's a chore to to just talk.

This is viewed by many as a fault, maybe it is. But it also comes from my optimistic and positive attitude I have.

It also comes from experience. It comes from getting a fb message from a friend who you wrote off for two years and him apologizing for being a dick when was fucked up. It comes from everytime I get into a "friendship fight" with someone and then within six months we are hangin again like it never happened. It comes from everytime I've said "He'll be back one day" or "She'll get over it and call me again" and I was right.

With that kind of history I am willing to have that kind of long line.

But even then, can I really forgive everything?

Can I forgive being completely ignored for over two years?

Can I forgive someone who isn't even man enough to pick up a phone and tell me with his own voice have he truly feels?

Is it worth it anymore no matter how well or how long I've known those people?